to catch the Virus
That seems to be
The undercurrent of my insanity
-- Sarah Fimm
Now they're saying that a virus may cause obesity. You know what? I think that eventually we'll find out that everything is caused by a virus. Impoliteness? Virus. Using the word "like" in every sentence? That's a virus too. I imagine the following future conversation:
Doctor: I'm sorry, but you've tested positive for HLV, the Human Laziness Virus.
Me: Oh . . . man . . . that's, well, it's awful, but it explains so much lately . . . is there a cure?
Doctor: No. Well, actually, yes, there is a cure, but you'd be too lazy to take it, so for all practical purposes there is no cure.
Me: I understand, doctor. Thank you for your honesty.
Doctor: You'll have to take precautions to not infect others. HLV is primarily transmitted through saliva, but boring anecdotes can also be a carrier.
Me: OK. I'll try to be responsible.