Thursday, September 29, 2005

Lost, Season 2, Episode 2

As soon as Kate was trapped alone and locked in the room, I said -- I actually said this out loud -- "No problem, she can just crawl out through the air ducts!" Of course, I was mostly joking and hoping this wouldn't happen, because it is one of the worst TV/movie/videogame cliches. Yes, every secure area just happens to have large, easily accessible, human-sized air ducts leading in and out of it. And the ductwork is always so sturdy that it can support the full weight of one or more adults, even though there is no conceivable architectural reason for this. Can you imagine the building designers arguing? "Fred, let's use very thin sheet metal or plastic for the air ducts, OK? It will save money." "Oh, no, if we did that, how would they be able to support the weight of a full-grown person crawling through them? Even though it will cost ten times more and only help our enemies to infiltrate or escape, we have to create incredibly strong reinforced air ducts. Think of them as uncomfortable hallways."

After that, I just started saying "filler" out loud every time the show went off on another useless tangent. OK, we get the idea, Mike cares about his son, we already knew that. Do we really need to see the exact details of his custody battle that happened years ago? Do we need to see some little cliffhanger scenes that are repeats of the exact same cliffhanger scenes we saw last week? You can't recycle cliffhangers, they become cliff-huggers!

Let me predict what happens in the next episode (and, for that matter, the next 5 episodes). Here goes:

Oh no, the Others are coming! They have big pointy sticks! They're after Mike and Sawyer. Run, Mike and Sawyer, run!

Cut to a flashback of some castaway's Mysterious Past. Something troubling happened to him or her years ago, which explains the occasional mysterious, troubled look in his or her eyes, but has no relevance to the current story.

Cut to a flashback of something that happened last week. Ooh, it was odd and unexplained then, and it still is now.

Insert random mysterious coincidences. Some dude has a weird symbol on his forehead, and, wait, isn't that the exact same symbol on the bottoms of Kate's shoes? Spooky! They find a bowling ball with a serial number on it, and it just happens to be the number of Sawyer's favorite phone sex line back home. Mega spooky! One character is thinking about a plate of shrimp, and just then another mentions a plate o' shrimp. Cosmic!

Cut to Locke saying something about fate and destiny. The island is like a box of chocolates. No matter where you go, there you are.

Here's what there won't be: good, reasonable explanations for any of the mysteries we have seen so far.

Monday, September 26, 2005

Computers

"Computers . . . so unreliable . . . just like people." -- Resident Evil: Apocalypse

"Oh drat these computers, they're so naughty and so complex, I could pinch them." -- Marvin the Martian

Rome, Romance, and The O.C.

"Of course, your best method of pleasing a woman is the warm beating heart of an enemy. I mean, women will say they don't like it, but they do, makes them wet as October. Failing that, talk to her."

-- Titus, explaining romance to Lucius on Rome


And is it just me, or is Atia the ancient Roman version of Julie Cooper? They even have a similar look. And that means Octavia is Marissa, Niobe is Summer, and Lucius is Seth. So Rome is just The O.C. set in the past.

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Something I Never Thought I'd Hear My Girlfriend Say

"That's not a homonculus!"

-- while talking to the cat. I'm not sure what the rest of the conversation was about, but I'm afraid to ask.

Thursday, September 15, 2005

Dispatch from a Deadbeat Muse

Summer leaves Portland without a going-away party. Summer slips away in the dead of night, skipping town with unpaid debts, without a note, no forwarding address, last seen headed south. You wake up early one morning and it's 50 degrees, and you shiver and say, "Oh . . ."

You feel dumped. Summer ditched you. Summer met someone living on the equator, or in Argentina, or somewhere, and moved in with them, and they aren't even as cute as you are. It must have been the accent.

You forage in the kitchen cabinets for coffee beans. You look outside at the stack of firewood. You start making plans for winter, even though it's still hazy in the distance.

The motorcycle starts to feel fierce again. The leathers feel cozy instead of deathly hot. The visor fogs a little in the morning and you realize you'd forgotten how that happens. The little inconvenience seems almost cute.

Summer will be back. It'll come crawling back eventually, drunk and crazy, ranting about the tropics, smelling of Ylang-Ylang and toucan feathers. It always does.

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Kumoricon 2005 Report


My Kumoricon 2005 report is now posted at JLHLS.

I liked this costume but the picture did not turn out very well, because the background was all wrong. So I blurred and darkened the background and made it monochrome using GIMP.Posted by Picasa

Kumoricon 2005, Haruko


Cosplayer dressed as Haruko from FLCL Posted by Picasa

Monday, September 05, 2005

Kumoricon 2005, Day 3, Elegance


Kumoricon 2005, Day 3. This was the last picture I took on my way out today. This costume looked elegant.

I have more pictures, but I'm saving them for my JLHLS report. Posted by Picasa

Kumoricon 2005, Day 3


Kumoricon 2005, Day 3. This group had a cool style and looked good together.

I'm just putting up a few pictures here on my personal site. I will be publishing a full report on Kumoricon 2005 later this week at The Journal of the Lincoln Heights Literary Society.Posted by Picasa

Saturday, September 03, 2005

Kumoricon 2005, Day 1, Link


Kumoricon 2005, Day 1. Link costume by Pikmin Link. This cosplayer later won the convention's award for best costume craftsmanship for a different Link costume: Link of Toaru Village. Posted by Picasa

Kumoricon 2005, Day 1, Chocobo


Kumoricon 2005, Day 1. Chocobo rider. Posted by Picasa

Friday, September 02, 2005

The Kooks Were Right?

As I read more about what has been happening in New Orleans, especially reports like this CNN report, I am struck by the strange feeling that maybe the "kooks" were right all along. The survivalist types have been saying: stockpile food, water, weapons, medicine, and other supplies, and be ready for the collapse of society. That seemed silly, until the collapse of society actually occurred in New Orleans, earlier this week. Sure, this is only temporary, and things will eventually be restored, but it made me realize something. Civilization does not have to collapse permanently to cause a huge problem. One or two days is enough. One or two days is plenty.