Monday, August 23, 2004

Scream if you love Art Thieves

An Edvard Munch painting, The Scream, was stolen, and Michelle wonders why the guards weren't armed:
So what is the point of having security guards without guns or anything else that would allow them to stop an art theft that occurred in broad daylight?

Well, this wasn't in the U.S., where every 6-year-old kid with a lemonade stand is packing heat to guard his inventory, but in peaceful, civilized Europe, where security guards and cops are only issued Silly String. But I digress.

Suppose they had guns. If I were a security guard, I might just be willing to enter into a gun battle and possibly give up my life for a painting, but it certainly wouldn't be over this painting. Those guards were probably grinning and high-fiveing each other after the theft, grateful that at long last they wouldn't have to look at the misshapen thing every day.

On the other hand, if I were a security guard, I could imagine having to cap someone to protect a nice Pre-Raphaelite work, and I'd be doing the whole slow-motion John Woo both-guns-blazing-leaping-ballet to keep thieves' filthy hands off of a Moreau or Rothko.

And that leads to the question: readers, if you were security guards, which paintings would you gunfight to protect?

4 comments:

moe said...

Pre-Raphaelite?

Why Iron Monkey, I had no idea you were such a sap!

j. brotherlove said...

Actually I like "The Scream". This robbery is just bananas! Why couldnt they snatch a few of Monet's hay stacks. Lord knows, I'm tired of seeing those.

Anonymous said...

Sorry, I'm a total heathen and have no opinion about art.

But I did like the Pre-Raphaelite paintings you linked to, expecially since they lead me to finally read Tennyson's The Lady of Shalott. (I knew about the poem, having read Agatha Christie's 'The Mirror Crack'd' at a young age, but had never gotten around to reading the poem.)

So, Thanks!

Michelle

Stasyna said...

They also stole the Madonna.

Supposidly they came for the Madonna but noticed The Scream on their dash out and grabbed it as well.

It'll be held for ransom at some undisclosed European city, where the govt. will pay large sums of money under the counter for it; all legal of course.